Friday, February 6, 2009

#51 Quitting Smoking

Yes, days without = 6!!! And that goes for wine too (see previous post)!! I am feeling really good about this accomplishment because I sincerely believe that I will only spiral so high with this deadly vice attached to my Divine self!

It makes me misty to think about the hand drawn signs my daughter has posted around the basement (my smoking spot). The first set featured crayon skulls and crossbones, and a "No Smoking" sign and a large X cut out of looseleaf paper. These were taped on the shelf above the deep freezer, where I keep my pack and lighter.

It broke my heart to see the next round of signage. Apparantly, she realized I was not obeying the "No" in No Smoking, so she made a sign that said "OK, you can have you fun on the weeks we're not here (i have bi-weekly custody) but when we are it can only be every other day!!! Tues, Thurs, and Sat." It made me sad to see her trying to work with me about my my bad habit. Now, I will be honest and say, that is NOT the day I decided to try quitting again. That would have been a nice little bow tied story wouldn't it? No, I caught a cold. And I don't smoke when I'm sick (because for me its social - hence the wine accompniament) and when I started feeling better, I just decided I don't want to reintroduce this to my life. I realize I may have to change my social habits for a while too. But, I'm looking forward to embracing different things to do to release stress besides the bar or picking up a bottle of wine. Like trying new teas...developing new, healthy rituals for alone time and for when I'm with my children.

So, tonight I am splurging on a dinner with then at one of our favorite little holes in the wall. Its been a while and I want to celebrate my week SMOKE FREE!!!

The above is African Voodoo Chai, a gift a sistren gave me for Kwanzaa, and it is so delicious!! I have incorporated it into my morning rituals of writing and reflection. With a little raw sugar and soy milk, yum!!!

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